Interesting pondering
Do we really every know who we are? or do we merely act. I wonder if people in general actually take time to pay attention and learn things about themselves.
If they don’t, how are they going to tell other people about themselves? They use the things around them to describe themselves, the things the like etc. Is that really what they are about though? Sure they like rock music, hiking, camping, etc. But telling someone things like that doesn’t really get things out like how big of a procrastinator they are or how insecure they are about themselves.
What a weird rambling !
last post
Obviously upset over something the other day. It’s all rather stupid, just needed to vent.
God I’m just glad its friday.
There is a pyre of ten thousand corpses burning within. The searing flames licking my insides as rage builds to momentous proportion throughout. What the fuck is going on. You say your glad it happened. Now you are communing with the enemy. If it’s on purpose I will rain fire and brimstone from this hellfire brewing inside.
Ex
And now it’s interesting. Looking from afar, I can see things I couldn’t see before. I think it’s funny. I chuckle secretly, viewing your actions of self indulgence and the mockery you are making of life.
What a change you have made my dear, what a facade you wear. Numb your feelings of regret with the nectar of pirates.
Your gratuitous indulgence in attention whoring is getting you no place. The momentary boost of self esteem. It’s an abominable drug darling, and you’re caught hook line and sinker.
How you used to look down on them, with harsh words that you spoke about them. Now you are them. The camouflage you wear is ever changing, fake as you are.
And I laugh inside.
oh my
could it be, inside me, something you see, that would make you be,
inclined to,
feel the same way I do?
It’s these late contemplative nights when delving into myself brings to the surface feelings.
As much as I wish I could hide them, they are there. Are you doing this to me? Am I doing it to me? Is it you I want? Or do I merely want someone?
Maybe its just me trying to replace what is gone, and it doesn’t have to do with what appears to be genuine feelings.
It’s just so confusing.
